Lecturer bans students from using “paper” and “pens.”

Paper is all very well for pictures of young women in a state of undress, but proper research mandates Wikipedia.
Paper is all very well for pictures of young women in a state of undress, but proper research mandates Wikipedia.

PECKHAM POLYTECHNIC, Saturday (UNN) — A lecturer has criticised students for relying on “books” and “journals” to do their thinking for them.

Tara Raboomtiyay, Professor of Reflexive Perspectives on Post-Modern Verbosity at the University of Bumsonseats, said too many young people around the world were taking the easy option when asked to do research and simply repeating the first things they found in library searches.

She has dubbed the phenomenon “The University of Dead Words On Paper.”

“The education world has pursued new technology with an almost evangelical zeal,” she said. “Too many students don’t use their own brains enough and just cite something they see in a ‘book’ or a ‘journal.’ We need to bring back the important values of critical reading and net forum discussion. Young people are finishing education with shallow ideas and need to learn interpretative skills before starting to use technology.

“Thousands of students across Britain are churning out banal and mediocre work by stringing together references to what ‘libraries’ provide them. I don’t think students come to university to learn how to use ‘books,’ they can all do that before they get here. It is an easy way out for tutors to let them work to their own devices using ‘literature searches,’ rather than active participatory discussion on phpBB. People have to pay to come to university now and what they are paying for is the knowledge, experience and guidance of forum moderators like myself.”

She will be giving a lecture on the issue, called Britannica Is White Bread For The Mind, at the Alan Dubious Lecture Theatre on Wednesday at 6.30pm.

2 thoughts on “Lecturer bans students from using “paper” and “pens.””

  1. David, you’re a little late in your satire — a little more than two thousand years late. The exact same argument was made by Socrates (or Plato, who put these words in Socrates’ mouth), for the exact same reason: writing weakened one’s memory.

    We could dismiss Socrates or Plato as simple cranks, the equivalent of Archimedes Plutonium — except that both are considered the founders of Western Philosophy.


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